Why bullying was my problem?

I’d never go somewhere with my friends because I’ve always been bullied even at work, the only friend I’ve had is the one who told me about the dairy but she was always busy. Her mother died, so the household things were on in her hands. Even my friend was bullied, we were a very quiet persons and I was more that she was because I have this nonsense of; I’m not speak to people unless they came and spoke to me but when your been bullied far too long that’s how you became and with a low self-esteem it get even worse. Much worse because you began to see your friends and people like tools; if I need you, I will use you and if not I leave you there. But I’m getting better, with the help of my Lord Jesus of course.